Tuesday, December 11, 2007

Oh S(h)ucks^^^

With its ferocious wildlife, walking through the jungles of Malaysia is not for the faint hearted. Not the tigers and venomous snakes of course -- you would be lucky to even spot one! The biggest threats are the mosquitoes and other bugs with the poisons and diseases they carry. Much less dangerous and very common are the leeches. They crawl into your socks and clothes for a painless blood meal. The guide explains before the trek how to handle these. Pulling them out can cause damage and not recommended. For smokers it is easy -- just give them a burn and they will fall off. Or you can use a penknife to chop it up.


Vera was walking with her fellow students on a school field study trip. She was clearly not experienced at jungle walks. She wore shorts! And this was a night trek! Almost immediately a leech anchored to the back of her thigh. She felt something and took out her flashlight and penknife to handle the critter. The very thought of cutting a leech was so "icky" but there was no choice. She quickly pressed the knife on the leech, sliced it in half and ran back to her holiday chalet. Cause of the problem? She wore a Short in the Dark.


During her shower, she glance back to where the bite was and to her horror, half of the leech was still clinging on! Blood was still slowly oozing out of the sliced body of the leach -- how gross! Now she understood why the guide had advised to "chop it up". Lesson Learnt? Never give a Sucker an Even Break.


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Dedicated to the suckers of the world -- that means almost everyone, I guess. For which one of us has not gone through life being conned at least once. Unrepayed loans, used by others for hidden agendas, manipulated - perhaps even willingly and happily, emotionally played out ... the list goes on. The meek shall inherit the Earth? Dream on.